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JOINING a virgins' club in high school would hardly seem to be the '90s path to popularity. But for a small band of teenage girls in Dallas, the unusual group symbolizes their commitment to their future.Corrian Spencer, the club's founder, was eager to avoid repeating her mother's experience as a teenage mother. With guidance from an innovative program for 12- to 17-year-old girls conducted by Girls Inc., Ms. Spencer is carving out a different life: She now attends college. At a time when casual sex has become almost a rite of passage for many teens, the three-year study by Girls Inc. (formerly Girls Clubs of America) offers encouraging news. Through mother-daughter workshops, educational and career planning, assertiveness training programs, and information about sexuality, the inexpensive program cut in half the proportion of 12- to 14-year-old girls who became sexually active. It also reduced by half the number of pregnancies among 15- to 17-year-olds. More than a million teenagers - 11 percent of all teenage girls in the United States - become pregnant each year. Nearly one-quarter will have a pregnancy by age 18, and 44 percent by age 20. Four of every 10 teen pregnancies end in abortion. The cost of government support to families formed by teenagers runs into billions of dollars a year. The cost in interrupted educations and careers is incalculable. Last month the 18-year-old star of the TV sitcom "Doogie Howser, M.D." complained that "being a virgin is driving me crazy." And so, in an episode that by all accounts was tastefully done, Doogie went to bed with his girlfriend, Wanda, taking care to use a condom. A few weeks earlier, Roseanne's daughter Becky announced that she was sexually active and needed birth-control pills. In the middle-class, make-believe world inhabited by Doogie and Becky, teenage sex carries a predictable glamour. Yet for poor teenagers in real life, the risk of sexually transmitted disease is assuming new dangers. The Centers for Disease Control found that between 1988 and 1990, the HIV infection rate doubled among young women. They are now one and a half times more likely than young men to carry the virus. Doctors fear teens may face a heterosexual epidemic. As one solution, however imperfect, teachers in 16 New York City high schools will soon begin distributing condoms upon request, without parental consent - a move that promises to raise legal and moral questions for years to come. The school board in Omaha, Neb., has voted to add a "contraceptive kit" to a 10th-grade human growth and development class. At the same time, the course will continue to stress abstinence. Abstinence has become a quaint and musty word. Like Doogie Howser, students often appear eager to shed what they perceive as the stigma of virginity. But now that the old problem of teenage pregnancy is compounded by the new specter of teenage AIDS, how much longer can parents and teachers pretend that superficial preventive efforts in schools will prove effective? Persuading people to alter their sexual behavior is never easy. Negative motivation - instilling fear of pregnancy and disease - serves as one approach. The more positive way of Girls' Inc. - teaching responsible decisionmaking, helping girls learn to say no without losing popularity - is another. At $116 a year per girl, the program represents a bargain. But neither the technical fix of contraception nor isolated cases of teenage idealism can begin to cope with the broad and deep confusions of the so-called sexual revolution. All the statistics add up to a conclusion as obvious as it is unfashionable: Decades of ever-expanding sexual freedom have produced something tragically close to the opposite of freedom in millions of damaged lives. How many more statistics are required before it will be conceded that nobody really won the sexual revolution?

The Sliver Ring Thing is on its way to Britain. More than 3.5 million teenagers from the United States have taken a public pledge before a cheering audience to remain virgins until their wedding night. The Silver Ring roadshow is one of the groups that stages these virginity carnivals - and it's opening a UK branch. It even offers teenagers a nice silver ring so they can send out the message that they are - in the words of one of their stickers - "Virgin Territory. Hands off."

Many British people will automatically dismiss these evangelists as American cranks - but their attitudes might be closer to the British mainstream than many people would like to admit. Teenage sex is always presented in Britain as a problem that must be tackled, dealt with, shut down, punished. In this climate, the Silver Ring Thing is not so insane. If all teenage sex is seen as a problem, abstinence looks like a solution.

British people should start to understand that, for most teenagers, sex is a pleasure and a joy, one of the few consolations in the protracted confusion and misery of adolescence. We should start from a different premise: that teenage sex is a natural and often good thing, with occasional negative consequences.

Teenage pregnancy and escalating rates of Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs) are real problems. But once we admit that there is a healthy side to teenage sex as well, we can begin to see why promoting chastity is both psychologically unhealthy and - crucially - so ineffective that, wherever it is tried, STDs and pregnancy rates rise.

Don't be deceived by the lazy thought that evangelists about to arrive here are just gormless hicks. The abstinence movement is very clever. The religious right learned in the 1980s that ranting against "sluts" and Aids victims - and saying that the West is now a latter-day Soddom and Gomorrah - is a certain route to extinction. The evangelists made a tactical shift, and began to couch their agenda in the Oprah-Ricki-Jerry language of self help and empowerment. So now they talk about giving teenagers a "choice" about sex, "empowering women to say no", and having compassion for the victims of sexually transmitted diseases.

All this masks their real project: to rehabilitate the notion of sexual shame. Scrape away the honey and sweetness, and shame is their defining, driving concept. When they exalt teenage girls to stay "pure", they are implicitly damning sexually active girls as "impure", dirty, fallen.

They want to take one of the great pleasures of life, coat it in a thick layer of shame and confine it within marriage. They want all teenagers, whose bodies are programmed to seek out mates, to suppress their sexual desire completely through "prayer, friendship and God's guidance".

For some parents who lived through the Sixties bonfire of taboos - and are now anxious when they hear horror stories about 12-year old mothers - this attempt to rehabilitate sexual shame might even seem a deal worth brokering. The perception of an Absolutely Fabulous generation - liberal parents confronted with conservative teenagers - don't seem to be matched by reality. The polls - and the reality of any city centre on a Saturday night - show that most young people reject sexual conservatism.

So it's almost impossible to imagine this shame-based agenda being popular with British teenagers, who are more likely to pray towards Ibiza than the Vatican. Yet some readers - especially concerned parents - might reckon that, since there are so many cultural pressures on teenagers to jump into bed, one little countervailing force might be a welcome corrective, whatever its wacky excesses.

In case you think I'm exaggerating, you should watch the popular Sex Respect video, distributed to more than one million US teens. A sassy, defiant 16 year-old girl asks an instructor, "So what if I want to have sex before I get married?" He furrows his brow and replies, "Well, I guess you'll just have to be prepared to die."

Yet the evangelists did have a clear impact: teens who promised to stay 'pure' were 20 per cent less likely to use condoms when they finally did have sex than normal teens. They were more likely to get the very diseases they have been drilled to fear. But when you try to engage these evangelists in a dialogue about evidence, you suddenly realise you are missing the point. They have a superstitious objection to pre-marital sex that precedes and disregards reason and facts. The Silver Ring Thing website declares that "by sleeping with someone, you are putting up a wall between you and God." That's the core of their argument. STDs are simply a whip to lash against lustful teens.

However messy, disease-carrying or strange sex can sometimes be, militantly suppressing it in the name of God is worse. Sexual shame has ruined countless lives. Now we are moving beyond it, almost everyone agrees that it doesn't deserve an army of virgins bearing silver rings. But have we really accepted that teenagers need and deserve shame-free sex as much as anyone else? The constant public angst about how to stop teenagers having sex suggests not. 041b061a72


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